Have you ever had a time in your life when you just felt everything pressing down on you like an enormous weight of burden, and you just needed to take a step back? A few months ago, I had that feeling. I felt overwhelmed by my life. I was overwhelmed by everything that I had to do and everything I wanted to do, and everything people expected me to do... to the point that even the things I wanted to do felt burdensome. I couldn't handle it. I guess I was depressed, although I hate to say things like that because it makes people nervous. I still had plenty of happy times, but I just felt lost.
It was around that time that I decided to stop blogging. I've had blogs off and on since college, and I end up either getting bored of them, putting something up that I shouldn't and then feeling guilty, or like this time... just getting overwhelmed by the burden of feeling like I HAD to post something and feeling bad if no one read what I wrote. So... I put the blog on private and let it go.
Then, on top of that, I took another Facebook break. This is actually the first one I stuck to without any problem. Over the month long break, I got on Facebook literally twice, and it was just to check a photo someone tagged me in, and once to check on something that was most easily found through that site. Other than that, I've had no temptation to get on. I just needed to recharge and get away from social media.
Throughout the last few months, I've gotten a lot of perspective. I've tidied up my life, found ways to organize what was previously disorganized, found the joy in the things that I wanted to do again... and at some point during the end of my Facebook break, found the desire to blog again.
As you can see, I've deleted all the previous blog posts. 4 years of blog posts, gone? No, not exactly. I found a program that turned my blog into a PDF file that I could print out... if I wanted. I would never print out 844 pages, but I feel better about starting anew with a backed up version somewhere for posterity sake.
Over the next few weeks, I'm going to show you snippets of what I've been up to and where I'd like my new blog to go. I'm starting off slow... one post a week at most. I've got plans to keep the blog fun. I don't want it to become a burden again, but I feel like writing is part of my creative outlet, along with photography, theatre and other new-found crafts... so I think that's what I'll be sharing on here. Just snippets of the new things I'm learning in life as a single, 30-something year old woman just trying to find balance in life.
I hope you'll join me!